Tuesday 29th July 2003 - Croakland to Sacto
Downtown Croakland
By the time we awoke, it was late morning. Once again, we had slept for no more than a few hours, but it was enough to suffice. How long would it be before we got a proper, full night's sleep? Who could say? You can't live the rock 'n' roll lifestyle and sleep too; that's for old folks, boring people, miserable gits, religious nuts and dead people.
We kicked Davey awake and returned to Mikey's place where the other members of our party awaited our appearance. Some of our entourage were more pleased to see us than others; we would just have to get used to the fact that one of us was going to be a sour twat for the next two weeks, no matter what. After a spot of bitching and whining, we clambered aboard the van and set off.
We hit the road to Sacto, sad amps and smashed guitars...
If you just started singing... slap yourself! Out on the I-580, I became fascinated by all these little houses on the hillside. Many were perched right on the edge of the cliff face. Was this wise when you live on the San Andreas fault, I wondered? Had they always been like that, or had erosion brought them close to the edge?
We kicked Davey awake and returned to Mikey's place where the other members of our party awaited our appearance. Some of our entourage were more pleased to see us than others; we would just have to get used to the fact that one of us was going to be a sour twat for the next two weeks, no matter what. After a spot of bitching and whining, we clambered aboard the van and set off.
We hit the road to Sacto, sad amps and smashed guitars...
If you just started singing... slap yourself! Out on the I-580, I became fascinated by all these little houses on the hillside. Many were perched right on the edge of the cliff face. Was this wise when you live on the San Andreas fault, I wondered? Had they always been like that, or had erosion brought them close to the edge?
Religion
Now, if I can just digress, here for a nanosecond. I'd just like to mention that religion and me just don't mix. I'm not ashamed of it, I'm not proud of it; it's a fact. I don't bother religion and it just needs to keep out of my face. I've never met a religious nut who wasn't trouble in one way or another. I'm not just talking mad-guntoting-towelhead-fly-a-plane-into-a-building-go-to-paradise-type nutballs. No, I'm talking about the ones who keep it quiet and don't mention it, then, one day: BAM! I'm a Holy Member of the Church of the Cross Carriers of Simon the timid wood-wittling, fisherman of Galifrey. Suddenly, it's sanity overboard, freak ahoy! The only thing to do in those circumstances is to get the Hell out of there, pretty sharpish.
Don't get me wrong, not all religious people are mad, just as all solicitors are not llama-loving, crooks and politicians are not lying cocksuckers. OK bad example. Some religious people are genuinely good and do their best to make the world a better place. However, far too many, in my opinion, use it either as a tool to oppress others, a reason to carry out evil deeds in the name of whatever Lord they deify, or simply as a substitute for a crutch of another kind. Religion is for people who can't deal with life, it gives them something to hang their shit onto and justify themselves. And, before you start playing that racist, ethnic card shit, you can shove that right up your ass, I'm not poking any particular race, minority or creed here; the white Englishman has done more than his fair share of evil, in the name of God. Personally, I'm with Humphrey Bogart on this one; just give everyone in the world three drinks to catch up and everything will be fine. Mind you, I'd go one better than Bogie. I'd give everyone a spliff to go with the three drinks.
Anyway, I just thought I'd mention that, as a little aside, seeing as how America is the home of TV evangelists, 21st Century organised religion, flash churches and making God so popular. I wonder, with all the people who talk to Him, on a regular basis, if He is going to get one of those contemporary robot-menu systems installed; pray once for forgiveness, pray twice for mercy, pray three times for explanations, and pray four times for miracles. Oh well, it was just a thought...
Don't get me wrong, not all religious people are mad, just as all solicitors are not llama-loving, crooks and politicians are not lying cocksuckers. OK bad example. Some religious people are genuinely good and do their best to make the world a better place. However, far too many, in my opinion, use it either as a tool to oppress others, a reason to carry out evil deeds in the name of whatever Lord they deify, or simply as a substitute for a crutch of another kind. Religion is for people who can't deal with life, it gives them something to hang their shit onto and justify themselves. And, before you start playing that racist, ethnic card shit, you can shove that right up your ass, I'm not poking any particular race, minority or creed here; the white Englishman has done more than his fair share of evil, in the name of God. Personally, I'm with Humphrey Bogart on this one; just give everyone in the world three drinks to catch up and everything will be fine. Mind you, I'd go one better than Bogie. I'd give everyone a spliff to go with the three drinks.
Anyway, I just thought I'd mention that, as a little aside, seeing as how America is the home of TV evangelists, 21st Century organised religion, flash churches and making God so popular. I wonder, with all the people who talk to Him, on a regular basis, if He is going to get one of those contemporary robot-menu systems installed; pray once for forgiveness, pray twice for mercy, pray three times for explanations, and pray four times for miracles. Oh well, it was just a thought...
A big-assed country. That's what it is...
Now, where was I? Oh, yeah, we are on the road to Sacramento, aren't we? As journeys go, this was a relatively short one - a couple of hours, or so. Of course, at this point, we had no idea how long some of the others were going to actually be. America is deceptive. You look at a map and think, 'Oh, that's not far.' But, it is a big-assed country and a little map! It's a bloody long way between places. Par example, San Francisco to LA is 5-6 hours along the I-5. If you drive for that long in the UK you're going from one end of the country to the other, in the US, you're travelling to the next city.
The one thing I had noticed was that as we headed inland, it was getting decidedly hotter. New York had been hot, but bearable. San Francisco had been cool when we landed, but it has its own weird climate anyway. It was getting decidedly warmer; all praise Willis Haviland Carrier, I say.
Below are some pics of random stuff on the road from Croakland to Sacto...
Now, where was I? Oh, yeah, we are on the road to Sacramento, aren't we? As journeys go, this was a relatively short one - a couple of hours, or so. Of course, at this point, we had no idea how long some of the others were going to actually be. America is deceptive. You look at a map and think, 'Oh, that's not far.' But, it is a big-assed country and a little map! It's a bloody long way between places. Par example, San Francisco to LA is 5-6 hours along the I-5. If you drive for that long in the UK you're going from one end of the country to the other, in the US, you're travelling to the next city.
The one thing I had noticed was that as we headed inland, it was getting decidedly hotter. New York had been hot, but bearable. San Francisco had been cool when we landed, but it has its own weird climate anyway. It was getting decidedly warmer; all praise Willis Haviland Carrier, I say.
Below are some pics of random stuff on the road from Croakland to Sacto...
Sacto
Downtown Sacramento is, at best, uninspiring. It looks as though it is a city designed for accountants to live and work in. There's nothing you could ever take offense at, but I'm sure that it is the sort of place where you can get locked up for wearing a baseball cap, backwards, after 9PM, whilst eating a hotdog, on Sundays, in March, in a leap year. My first instinct was that this was not a place where people know how to have fun, or even have any experience of it.
Everything is neatly trimmed, nicely painted, swept clean and so tidy you can eat off the sidewalk. But, you get the feeling that they probably put bromide in the water, as well as fluoride. Keep the people from all those nasty thoughts of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll. It is more likely to host a Symphony Orchestra than a bunch of smelly, pierced and tattooed punk kids. We are talking dull, people. The streets do not have names, they have letters. The venue, The Capitol Garage, is on 'L St'. I jest not. Designed by architects, for accountants. Would it be populated by clones and drones?
You think I'm joking? Check this out: http://www.saccounty.net/
Everything is neatly trimmed, nicely painted, swept clean and so tidy you can eat off the sidewalk. But, you get the feeling that they probably put bromide in the water, as well as fluoride. Keep the people from all those nasty thoughts of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll. It is more likely to host a Symphony Orchestra than a bunch of smelly, pierced and tattooed punk kids. We are talking dull, people. The streets do not have names, they have letters. The venue, The Capitol Garage, is on 'L St'. I jest not. Designed by architects, for accountants. Would it be populated by clones and drones?
You think I'm joking? Check this out: http://www.saccounty.net/
The Capitol Garage
The Capitol Garage, is exactly what it says on the sign; a [former] garage. It is a rarity in the USA. It does not have air-conditioning and for that one fact, the owners should be flogged, paraded naked along M Street, covered in honey and left for the fire ants to deal with. What are these people? Savages?
That said, as the evening wore on, it cooled slightly and even became pleasant at one point.
The gig itself was quite unremarkable. The Skeptix were somewhere between mediocre and average, the venue was small and the crowd was, er, select.
The only entertainment of the night was provided by the total pillock showing his pants in the photo, left. This total tosser made a complete dick of himself all night, with his 'power skanking' dance routine. The only problem was that as the night wore on, he got more wasted and his dancing became even more outrageous. Eventually, he was just getting pushed around and falling over. I half expected/hoped that someone would drag him outside, kick seven shades out of him and pee on the loser.
That said, as the evening wore on, it cooled slightly and even became pleasant at one point.
The gig itself was quite unremarkable. The Skeptix were somewhere between mediocre and average, the venue was small and the crowd was, er, select.
The only entertainment of the night was provided by the total pillock showing his pants in the photo, left. This total tosser made a complete dick of himself all night, with his 'power skanking' dance routine. The only problem was that as the night wore on, he got more wasted and his dancing became even more outrageous. Eventually, he was just getting pushed around and falling over. I half expected/hoped that someone would drag him outside, kick seven shades out of him and pee on the loser.
Greg And Natasha
Now, what can I say about Greg and Natasha? Probably nothing that won't get one of us locked up, that's for sure. This pair turned up at the Sacto show. Skeptix fans, don't you know. Yes, we found them, who'd a thunk it? Tash had a Born to Lose tat on her arm, the guys sort of adopted them and they promised to turn up at the Reno show, the next day. Fair enough. We'd got our very own stalkers. Woo-hoo!
Nice tatttoo... That's Greg, Ush, and Natasha in the photo. Thing is, pets are not just for Christmas, they are for lunch. Eh? No... I mean, if someone came up to you and said: "Hey, I'm a bunny-boiling psycho bitch that will shag anyone for a snootfull of Coke!" would you welcome them in to your inner circle? Greg was alright though. Of course, at this point, we had no idea how much of a nutjob Nats was...
And you know the really weird thing about Sacto? I have no idea where we spent the night. We got in the van after the gig and I was a bit tired, I have to say. It seems that I fell asleep immediately. I have no recollection of anything until about 4AM. I woke up in the van, hot, sweaty and feeling like I'd broken my neck. It was stifling, so I cracked open the window and sucked the glorious, life-giving, fresh air, which was actually quite cold. I seemed to be alone, but could hear people outside, somewhere. A party, police, someone throwing up, it was none of my concern and it could wait until the morning.
Click here for the next bit
Nice tatttoo... That's Greg, Ush, and Natasha in the photo. Thing is, pets are not just for Christmas, they are for lunch. Eh? No... I mean, if someone came up to you and said: "Hey, I'm a bunny-boiling psycho bitch that will shag anyone for a snootfull of Coke!" would you welcome them in to your inner circle? Greg was alright though. Of course, at this point, we had no idea how much of a nutjob Nats was...
And you know the really weird thing about Sacto? I have no idea where we spent the night. We got in the van after the gig and I was a bit tired, I have to say. It seems that I fell asleep immediately. I have no recollection of anything until about 4AM. I woke up in the van, hot, sweaty and feeling like I'd broken my neck. It was stifling, so I cracked open the window and sucked the glorious, life-giving, fresh air, which was actually quite cold. I seemed to be alone, but could hear people outside, somewhere. A party, police, someone throwing up, it was none of my concern and it could wait until the morning.
Click here for the next bit